When the hell does you'll get over it begin

(sorry guys, I'm sick, again, but I got it done only 2 hours after Monday ended! And if there's any typos I blame the nyquil, lol)


The next few days were a blur of meetings, orientations, team building exercises, and hikes. I felt bad because at the end of the night, I was so tired I would come back and just crash, but at least I didn’t have time to feel homesick. Cumulus was having the time of his life romping around in the woods, and I knew when I took him home, he’d miss the space. However, we were given the last two days before the kids were due back as time off – we were encouraged to get to know each other better, and a group had asked me to go out to dinner and a local bar with them. I agreed, but I knew I needed to make some catch up phone calls first.

I called my Mom first, and we had a strained conversation. She never really loved me working with at risk kids – said it was dangerous – but me going away to work with at risk kids really rubbed her the wrong way. It’s not like Mom and I were super close anyway. I think honestly we were just took similar to do so. I also wished at some point she’d stop Mothering me. I know it sounds weird, because she’s a Mom and that’s what she’s supposed to do, but I think at a certain age a Mom should step down and become more of a friend or at least realize that she has no control over what you do anymore. I also got to talk to my Dad, and it made my heart ache when I realized just how much I missed him.

Next on the list was actually Jason. I probably should have called Matt first, as he was the one who had been trying to get ahold of me, but curiosity won when I saw that I had a missed call from Jay the night before. He and I hadn’t spoken in a while, and I was curious to see what he wanted.

“Hey you.” He answered. “Didn’t think I’d hear back from you. Word on the street is that you fell off the face of the planet.”
“Ha, who’d you hear that from?”
“Drewbie.”
I choked on the soda I had just taken a sip of.
“You OK over there?”
“Yeah…” I answered, catching my breath. “How would Drew know what I was up too?”
“…You guys still aren’t talking?”
“Not really. No.”
“Huh. He didn’t mention that. I just called him last night and mentioned trying to call you. He said nobody’s been really able to get ahold of you.”
“I’ve been working a lot. You know how it is.”

I wanted so badly to press Jason for more info: what did he say about me? Who had Drew talked too about me? But, I refrained. I was supposed to be here getting a break from everyone, and I highly doubt Jason knew anything anyway, especially since he hadn’t realized Drew and I weren’t talking.

“Oh yeah. How is that new job?”
“Don’t really know yet. We’ve just been doing all the getting to know you stuff. Which, I’m not a fan of. It always comes off so cheesy to me. And I don’t like talking about myself. I’m also a lot more home sick than I thought I would be.”
“Well, you’re an Ohio girl at heart.”
“I know.” I paused for a moment. “So… What’s up?”
“I can’t just call you to say hi?” Jason asked, pretending to sound offended.
“Well. You haven’t, in I don’t know how long. So. No?”
“OK, you’re right. I do have a reason for this phone call, BUT I should call you more often just to say hi.”
“What’s the reason?”
“I met someone. And, I know you don’t have to know, or approve or anything, but… I’m just trying to do things right this time. Taking things slow, and being as honest as I can be. So, I thought you deserved a heads up. I just met her, so I’m not talking marriage or anything yet, but I do really like her.”
I paused for a moment, to register how I felt. I was a little sad, but I think that’s to be expected. I think Jason and I had had something at one point, and it’s always sad when things ended, but I think I knew deep down that things were way too complicated to ever work out between us.
“You still there?”
“I am. Just thinking about things.”
“What kind of things?” He asked.
“You and me. We had a run, didn’t we?”
“We did. To be honest, I wanted to tell you so that if you wanted to give it one last shot, we could. Before things got serious. I don’t want you to have any regrets later on down the road, and I don’t want to think that I didn’t try either.”
“We can’t, Jas. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I didn’t want too, but there’s too much to get over. And, I don’t think our friendship could take it. I don’t want to lose you.”
“I figured you’d say that. I just had to give it a shot.”
We were quiet for a moment, neither of us sure what to say.
“Why aren’t you and Drew talking?”
“He has a girlfriend, who asked him to distance himself from me. It really hurt. I kind of get it now that I’ve had some distance from the situation. Drew was after me for so long and his and my history is almost as complicated as mine and yours, and I get she didn’t want it to interfere, but…” I shrugged, even though I knew Jason couldn’t see me. “It really hurts that he picked someone else over me. And what happens if they like, get married or something? Am I out of his life for good? I dunno. It’s just a mess.”
“Well… I’m not sure if I should tell you this…”
“Tell me what? You can’t say that and not tell me.”
“I think she’s moving out.”
“They just moved back in together.”
“I know. But when I called, Drew said he needed to go get boxes for his move back to Toni’s. I don’t know why he’d move back in with Toni if he was staying at a place with her.”
“I feel so out of the loop.” I said. And I did. But really, I don’t know if I minded. I wasn’t sure what to do with this new information, and I didn’t like the way it was making me feel.
“You’ll be home soon enough.”
“I know. Speaking of which, I hate to cut this short babe, but I do have some other calls to make. We’ve been so busy these last couple of days and I haven’t been able to talk to anyone. I finally have some down time and I have to squeeze everyone in.”
“Well, thanks for making time for me. I’m back home for a couple days actually. I might drive in tomorrow and visit Drew.”
“I’ll always have time for you Jay. I wish I could be there.”
“I know, I’ll talk to you later.”
“Hey Jay?”
“Yeah?”
“I am glad you found someone. I hope it works out.”
“Me too El.”
“Bye Jason.”

I didn’t have much time left before I had to start getting ready to go out with the group, and I couldn’t ignore Matt again, so instead of sitting and processing all that information, I called him as soon as I hung up with Jason.

My phone was hot against my face, and even though I hadn’t planned on anything, I blurted out when he picked up “what’s going on with Drew and his girlfriend.”
“Well, hello to you too. I’m doing fine, thanks for asking, I’m glad you’re not dead as I presumed.”
“Sorry Matt, how are you? I’ve been super busy. Now what’s going on with Drew and his girlfriend?”