And I was hoping it could end on a happy note...

Here's the thing... If you were supportive about me ending the blog, you can read this, but please know, it is NOT directed to you at ALL. I appreciate all the kind responses - especially the ones who said they were disappointed but understood. I get being disappointed, I am disappointed too, but I think MOST of you realize what I am trying to say, and therefore, this explanation is not for you.

I hesitate to say anything at all, because I am afraid of offending people who I don't mean to offend, so again, I stress the fact that if you haven't said anything, if you've wished me well, this is NOT for you in the least bit. There have only been a few negative comments, and since they were all (of course) anonymous, I have no way of telling just how many people have been commenting. But really, it has pissed me off and even hurt my feelings, so please excuse me for ranting.

For those of you who say I'm being inconsiderate, rude, or disgusting by ending the blog... Really? Do you REALLY not get it? This blog was a HOBBY, something I did for FUN. I enjoyed doing it for awhile. I enjoyed the friends I made while doing it. I enjoyed the good comments, and even the bad ones, because some of them made me take a look at what I was doing and see if there was any way to better myself. But the fact of the matter is, as I have said NUMEROUS times: I will end the blog when it's no longer fun. And guess what? It's no longer fun! You guys sitting here calling me rude and inconsiderate and demanding I give you an ending almost make me want to not come back at all. To not even try to write an ending. But I know there are MORE people who appreciate what I did, MORE people who understand where I coming from, and to punish them for a few assholes making stupid, selfish and hypocritical remarks would MAKE me rude and inconsiderate to the people who did nothing but support and love this blog.

I ALWAYS said everyone has a right to an opinion if they express it respectfully - and I don't think some people get that, because it seems to me that people are allowed to say whatever they want to me, using whatever rude and personal attacks that they see fit, but the SECOND I try to explain or defend myself - even WITHOUT the name calling - I suddenly become the bad guy : the rude one who's being selfish, immature, disgusting, whatever fill in the blank that you see fit.

Today I got called hormonal, which, you're totally right I am. I cried during American Idol yesterday and today because I was so sad Simon was leaving. And I don't even like the show all that much! That's hormonal. But responding to an attack someone makes by expressing my opinion respectfully is NOT hormonal, it is a NORMAL reaction. You know what I think is a tad hormonal? People who are SO upset by a FREE blog ending that they would name call like five year olds? If I'm hormonal, you must be MAJORLY on the rag.

Again, saying you wish it would go on, I get. Saying you're disappointed I'm not continuing, I get. Asking me to please try to work out an ending? I understand that as well. Those are normal, those are things I myself are thinking: I wish I felt like going on, I loved this blog SO much and now all of a sudden I don't, I'm disappointed that I just don't feel I can stick it out anymore, and really I would LOVE to give the blog an ending - but one that I think FITS the blog, not just some piece of crap that I threw together to please people, but I know if that happens, people will NOT be pleased. But telling me I'm being ungrateful and selfish and that I OWE you an ending? Again, I pose the question: Why do I owe you anything? As I said in my previous statement, I appreciate ALL the support, well wishes, compliments I got. But it's not like I didn't WORK for them, I spent a lot of time not only writing the posts, but figuring out how to do the layout of the blog, making play lists, answering emails... I didn't get paid for it. I didn't get back the time I spent away from my son, my husband. House work that didn't get done during nap time had to be made up during the evening time - time I normally spent with my husband. I find it hard to believe that any of you making negative comments would do so much work without getting paid - unless you enjoyed doing it. And when you stopped enjoying it? I highly doubt that you would feel as if you owed anyone anything. It's give and take. I wrote entries, people commented. We broke even like that. It's not like I left with a balance due. You gave me support and compliments, and for awhile I gave you what I tried to make a good story. I can no longer make a good story, I no longer want too. I was hoping a break would bring it back, and I said that I may be back, but some people automatically just wanted to jump on the negative and demand that I give them something.

Again, I hope that I am VERY clear to the people who said nothing negative: I appreciate EVERYTHING. Every comment, every note, every word of encouragement. But I just don't feel like I owe anyone anything... I gave you all I had, right now I have nothing left to give, and if that wasn't enough... Well, I don't know what to tell you.

For now, the comments are turned off. I feel bad because I have a feeling some people won't check in till friday and won't get to say their goodbyes, if they want too. But I'm sorry, I just don't want to hear anymore. I made the decision that I felt was best for my family and I. I've always said my family comes first, and I don't want to take time away from them to do something I don't even enjoy - that takes more time to do now, even when I'm only posting 2 times a week, then it did when I was posting four times a week.

Again, I think the majority of you guys get it, and again, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! It was hard making this decision, but I am hoping that FOR YOU GUYS I will be back and ready to go at the end of the summer.

As I said before, for those of you who want to keep up on personal life things, the blog link is www.sproutmakes4.blogspot.com

Just to be clear - this post will have no set schedule, it could end at any time (though I will always tell you when and why I'm ending), and I ask that we not talk about the Apathy blog over there. Also, while I was wide open with comments and opinions on this blog, I ask that if you have nothing nice to say, you don't comment. Rude comments will be deleted, as well any comments about this blog. I may one day show my kids that blog.

Again, thanks SO much to the people who wished me well, I really hope to be back when the summer is over.