I wanted to edit this to add a few things that people have been concerned about:
1.) I would really like to make an ending, however I am NOT willing to slap an POS ending on it for the sake of it. I think it's much better to let people imagine their own endings rather than be seriously dissatisfied with an ending I pulled together because I felt like I had too. So basically while on my break, I'm going to at least try to head towards an ending. If it comes, it does, if it doesn't - you'll just have to make up your own.
2.) I won't take the blog down. Many people have said they'd like to go back and read, and you're totally welcome too. I've also been toying with seeing if someone would like to take over - I'm not sure about this one yet because... Well, it's kind of my baby and I dunno if I'd get pissed off if someone took it where I didn't want it to go, lol, but we'll see.
3.) A lot of people have asked to keep them updated on the family and the baby. I've started a new blog for this: http://www.sproutmakes4.blogspot.com/ There's no posts up yet, and I'm not promising a posting schedule at ALL, but I promise to announce milestones - when we find out the sex, what we name the baby, when the baby is born. I may do more - I journal for the baby and Cayden both, so this may take over as the main outlet, I don't know. And for those who may think it's bull that I'm quitting this blog and starting another - it's a lot easier and quicker to jot down notes from real life than to make something up, and again, I'm not even promising I'll be on there a lot. I just don't want to clog this area up with updates, and I thought it would be a good way to also keep in touch with people and let people know if/when I'm coming back.
I think that sums it up.
I know lately there have been a couple of people unhappy/complaining about the blog. I can't really blame them, to be honest. This blog used to be my baby, and I would think about it all the time, and have posts written out in my head before I even sat down to write. I knew where it was going, I was excited to write, excited to see what you guys thought. And people really seemed to like it then.
Now? Not so much. I know some people might say I'm unhappy with the blog because I'm not receiving all praise... But I don't think that's it. I became unhappy with the blog before the negative comments came in, and I think they came in because I was unhappy and it showed in my postings. I just don't like to do it much anymore - and again, I think it shows. It's like, I went from posting four times a week with little to no problem, and now I can barely manage two times a week. It's not because I have all this stuff to do (although I do find myself busier now that the weather is nice and I want to take Cayden outside) but mainly because I just don't WANT to write. I don't know if I burnt myself out posting four times a week, and now I just can't recover, or if the story has just reached it's end (only doesn't yet have an ending). And again, I think people are complaining because I'm rushing to post and it's total and utter crap. At least that's how I feel - that stuff just isn't as good as it used to be. Maybe it was always crap, lol, but I felt differently.
I'm not writing this to get people to kiss my ass and ask me to stay - feel free! ha ha, who doesn't like compliments? But it still sums up to the fact that I just DON'T like to write anymore, and I don't think all the compliments in the world are going to change that.
I've struggled with what to do, and I just don't know. I really enjoyed talking to you guys, and getting to know you, and I loved sharing the story with you, and hate to just leave you hanging, but I just... Dunno if I can bang out an ending that's worthy, ya know? So I think I've decided to take the summer off. I can spend time with Cayden outside, without worrying about when to post, and maybe it'll come back to me and I can save up some posts. Maybe it won't and the blog will just have to end without an ending.
I'm sorry if you're unhappy with the decision I made - I know it sucks leaving you guys hanging, but personally I think it will suck more giving you guys half assed posts that suck.
And if I came out at ALL bitchy in this, or sounding ungrateful, please know that I did NOT mean too in the least bit. Again, I have had negative comments lately, and while negative comments suck (Honestly, do you like them?) I do know that I've gotten far more positive ones than negative, and again, I really think a lot of those comments stem from the fact that it's really just not very good anymore.
Breaking the Surface
10 years ago
23 comments:
Laura---
Take your time and enjoy your pregnancy and your time with your son. If you come back, great! If not, oh well.
Have you thought about possibly giving your ideas to someone else and letting someone else write for you?
I think we all understand needing to take a break. I imagine having a blog is kind of similar to having a child... you love it, and you want to spend all your time with it, but after a while you just get burnt out and need some time away.
And you know what? If it turns out you can't continue with this story, that's fine. It had a good run and we all appreciate having had it to distract us from our own lives. Maybe you'll find a new story to be passionate about.
Just do us a favor and don't remove your old posts... I really hate when other blogs end and delete everything like they never existed in the first place *cough*15miles*cough*.
Thanks for understanding guys. I really didn't want it to come across as I was throwing a hissy fit and quitting. But Jillybean - you're exactly right. I want to send the blog to a sitter, lol. I think I just posted too often at first and now I'm just tapped out. I've tried taking week long breaks and all that happens is that I hate coming back even more. Plus, this is the only time I'll have left with just my son and I before the new baby comes. While the posting schedule is way down, I hate taking any amount of time away from him - even the Whatever Wednesday's which take me about five minutes to do.
And I have thought about letting someone else take over if they wanted. I go back and forth on that... Part of me doesn't care, but another part is just like... This is my baby, and I'm afraid if someone else took it over, they'd do something I didn't like and it would just irritate me, you know? I think I'll decide on that at the end of the summer as well.
I'm hoping at the VERY least to come up with an ending, but you're right, if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. I just want you all to know that if it doesn't happen - I had a lot of fun, and really appreciate you reading.
And no, I wouldn't take it down :-)
It's so sad to see you leave for the summer and possibly forever. Just wanted to let you know that I loved every post.
Enjoy your pregnancy and the time with your son and husband.
Please update us on how everything with the fam is going if you can!
I will miss reading the story. I have really enjoyed it. Please keep the blog up, I would like to go back and re-read it. I am learning the hard part about fictional blogs is there is rarely a "wrap it all up" ending.
I guess we will all have to "write" our own ending for Ella. I never thought I would say this, but I think that Ella and Jason are meant to be. So that is how I will imagine it.
Good luck to you Laura. You have a lot of talent, so I hope you keep writing for yourself. Best wishes on the new baby and I hope your husband is able to find a new job soon.
I was totally impressed that you were ever able to write 4 times a week. I think we all knew that there is no way you could keep that up forever. It was great while it lasted :)
I hope you have a fantistic summer with Cayden, but not so fantistic that he feels totally miffed when a new baby comes!
Yes in "my" ending Drew and Ella end up together.
Take the summer off, I completely understand wanting to spend time just you and Cayden before the new baby comes. I was lucky enough when I was pregnant with my 2nd that I lost my job and had most of the summer to spend with my son. It's nice so enjoy. But the blog, try to work out an ending. I can end it my own way off course, but I'd much rather see your ending. So while your on your hitas (sp??) think how you'd want to end this. Maybe even write in down when and if you want to. But if you don't I think I'll have Drew get cousiling, make up with mom, Seth's sister get a miricle cure and marry Matt, Drew discover a new love, Seth and Ella break up on good terms, and yes this surprises me, Ella and Jason finally get together lol.
I have to admit i am going to miss the story, but i do understand why you feel the need to take some time away. Hopefully by the time you think about coming back you will have missed it and can write again.
if anything ever pops in your head while taking your sabbatical you can always write it up in word and just not post it so that you can post it when you do feel ready. good luck, let us know how things are going with your pregnancy & such.
Laura,
You are in such a bittersweet time of your life right now. On one hand, you are thrilled to have a new baby growing inside you, imagining holding her or him in your arms...On the other, this precious little boy who is your whole world and your heart is breaking because you know that he's not going to ever be the baby again after this. Don't miss a moment with him!
My kids are less than two years apart, and I went through this same struggle. I got my son as involved in the pregnancy as possible, taking him to ultrasound appointments and letting him sing to baby sissy. But, it was awful for him when he was suddenly the big brother and had to share the attention.
Thanks so much for sharing your story with us. If you do continue after a break, I'll be thrilled. I've told you before, and I'll say it again. I read and have read several blogs. This blog and The Karen Chronicles are above and beyond the very best I've read (and that includes some of the professional blogs on magazine sites). Even if you don't come back, though, I hope you'll share your life with us--would so love to see pictures of the new baby, etc. Blessings to you, and have a wonderful summer.
Laura,
When I asked you whether I should start my blog, and you told me to go for it, you also said that you were going to stop when it wasn't fun anymore. If it really isn't fun for you or you're unhappy with it, then maybe you should take a break.
You're writing is far from crap though, yeah its been slow lately but it doesn't mean that you're writing was actually crap, because it wasn't.
Hope everything works out for you,
Alicia
Ok, this is my first post, but I wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed your blog. This is the only one that I really follow and I am going to miss it!!
I really hope that you are able to come back and enjoy it again!!
Laura,
We all go through phases, or at least I do. I've gone through obsessive blogging phases, obsessive exercise/fitness phases, obsessive cooking phases... But then things change, ppl become distracted, lose interest...So it totally makes sense that it might be harder for you to write now than before. It has nothing to do with ppl's responses (so you don't have to defend yourself), it's just a fact of life.
I'll be sad to see your blog go, but if it's not something you're interested in / WANT to do, then maybe it is better for you to be "done" than to keep forcing yourself :) Your plan sounds pretty reasonable - if it comes, it comes, and if not, well we've enjoyed your blog the past half year or so (has it been a year yet? almost now, rt?), so thanks for that :)
Thanks also for letting us know not to expect any posts for the summer - then we won't keep checking back day after day and being disappointed :)
Hope you at least let us know when you find out the sex of your baby, if you pick a name, and when he or she finally comes! (although I guess baby won't come until long after summer...)
p.s. the "word verification" on my screen rt now is "latra" => so close to laura! :P
You guys are so nice, it's really making me want to cry, lol. Of course - that's not really hard to do.... Last night I cried during American Idol because I realized Simon was leaving and thought "he must be sad"
I'm very realistic that if I don't write anything at all during this break, I won't be back - I'm not going to force myself, because as I said, it won't be fun for me to do, or you guys to read. I am sad I didn't make it to the one year mark - we were so close! But oh well! I will let you guys know about the baby - I'm due beginning of December, and while I suspect I may go in November (since it'll be a c-section, they tend to like to schedule the week before) It'll still be awhile. We're hoping to find out the sex in 2 weeks, and I'll be back to let you know what it is, and a name (if we have one. We have a girl name. No idea on a boys!) I was thinking the day before I might post a poll just to see what everyone thinks it is, for fun.
I will also let you know for sure if I'm not coming back. I figure if September hits and I'm not feeling it, then I'll end it, and decide then what to do. I will leave it up though!
I'm not a "comment poster", but I have to this time. I am going to miss this story so much. I've been a reader of Diary of V, Diary of E, Utopia, and yours. I miss all of them! And I will miss yours just as much. :-(
I want to beg you to keep writing, but I'm a mom of 3 (much older than yours) and totally understand life's committments and what you need to put first.
Thank you for all the posts you've given us and (just so you know), I'm keeping this on my Favorites list and will check back A LOT to see if you've returned.
Thanks for great entertaimment, Laura.
Pat
I have been a long time follower of your blog, but this is my first time commenting. I have to say that I am really disappointed that you have chosen to stop writing. I understand why you are doing it, but I have to say that it is very inconsiderate to just end the blog without giving it an ending or any closure. I am not saying the ending has to be final, but your readers deserve to have something to finish it off, even if it is just for the summer. Otherwise, it’s just like when a television show is cancelled and you never get to see the finale – you feel cheated. I would love for you to continue writing, or to come back in the fall, but I do believe your readers deserve some sort of closure.
Hey anon-
I don't really think I'm being inconsiderate at all. I mean the thing about TV shows and all that - they get paid for what they do. It's their job. This isn't my job. I don't get paid for it. I do it for enjoyment, as a hobby. I don't enjoy it anymore, so why should I do it?
I feel badly about not writing an ending, because I really love a lot of my readers and would like to wrap it up for them, but I don't really feel like I owe anyone anything. And honestly, if I ended the blog write now? It wouldn't be an ending anyone deserved. Ella's too confused so her settling down with anyone wouldn't be right at all - it would be totally out of the blue, and totally unbelievable. Honestly I think if I were to end it now, I would have them driving home from vacation, getting into a wreck, and dying. I mean that's the only plausible ending I can see, and I don't think anyone would really be happy with that.
Laura-
From someone who has religiously checked your blog every weekday morning since last fall, I have to say that I do feel that your readers deserve an ending. I'm sorry that you don't enjoy it anymore, but I do think that the people who have been so loyal and kind throughout the life of this blog should get some type of closure. I'm not saying that you should officially end the blog today, but do you have to end on a Toni's POV post?
Right now it is ended on Toni's post, and that's where it's going to stay unless I take a break and feel ready to come back.
Again, I'm sorry to disappoint anyone, but I still don't feel like I owe anyone anything. It's not like you guys paid for a year's subscription and I'm cutting out early and not refunding any money. You religiously checked every day, some people commented every day, and I appreciate that, but again, how do I owe anyone anything?
What I don't think you're taking into consideration is I've done this for almost a year - for FUN - taking time away from my husband, my son, my family, my household duties. Because I LIKED doing it, so therefore the enjoyment was payment for me. Would you go to work every day if you didn't get paid? Probably not. And I promised I would continue doing this as long as I liked doing it, again, because that was reward enough for me. But I don't like doing it anymore, it's taking away time from my husband, time spent with my son - and in a few months, I'm going to have to divide my time, time away from household chores, which more than any time, I really need to get my house in order NOW before the baby comes. Not to mention, I'm still looking for a job in order to help me pay for this new baby. Something has to take a back burner. It's not going to be my family, and my house has already taken quite the hit.
Again - you haven't given me anything. If anything, I've given YOU guys something. And like I said - I enjoy the compliments, I appreciate them, but a compliment probably takes two seconds to write, where as a blog entry can take anywhere from an hour to days. Checking and reading the blog, takes maybe 10 minutes. So how is it even? How does that end up with me owing YOU something? If anything, maybe YOU guys owe me something, and in a way, I think most people have given it- by being very understanding about me leaving.
Again, I want to give an ending because I do appreciate the followers - but it almost ticks me off that anyone things I owe them anything. Did you pay for anything? No. Did you give me anything? Sure, your time, but I gave you my time as well.
Again, I'm not saying it's over for good. I've said it multiple times now - if I feel like writing on my break, I will, and I will come back. I am at the very least going to try to put an ending on it. But if it doesn't happen - it doesn't happen. Again, I think it would do a far bigger disservice to just slap an ending on, because as I said before I would probably just end up killing everyone off.
Again, I'm sorry you do feel like something was owed to you, but I think after all this time where I posted something for free, that something is owed to me - time with my family, not working on the blog.
Laura, just ignore any negative comments. Of course we're disappointed but Id say most of us understand. Like you said, you dont owe anyone anything- you kept us all entertained for quite a while! While I would definitely love to see an ending sometime, I fully understand and appreciate you needing time to step back and enjoy your son and your pregnancy. Best wishes and hope to read something in the future!
Laura,
You are 100 percent correct, you don't owe anyone anything!!! You did at least have the courtesy of informing everyone that you were done, which many other blogs have not even done that.
Thank you for the story for as long as it lasted! It was one of the best written blogs I have read.
Good luck with your pregnancy and I will definitely be checking your sprout blog!
Kim
You know Laura, I started reading this blog and I absolutely LOVED IT. It seemed like such a real story--and it was easy to become attached!
However, the most recent comment on here about how none of us gave "YOU" anything...that was a little low. It actually disgusted me to the point that wether or not you come back, I'm over this blog.
Please understand that WE appreciated you, and YOU are the one who is choosing to end thing. There was no reason to get all HORMONAL and nasty. You completely contradict yourself in various statements...making a rude remark and then "apologizing" for it. BS.
I really was disappointed and a little disgusted with the comment.
I wish you the best of luck in your personal life, but you might as well stop with the blog as you are clearly unappreciative (you wouldnt say the things you have if you truly were) of the fans who helped you through the past year with your story.
Let me guess... Because I'm pregnant, I'm automatically hormonal. It could have nothing to do with the fact that maybe I was a little hurt and disgusted by someone claiming that I owed them something, especially when I worked really hard for almost a year putting out something for free?
I only listed about a MILLION times that I appreciated the nice comments, that I appreciated the support, and I do. But again, your support and love doesn't pay my bills, it doesn't take care of my family, it doesn't do dishes, vacuum the floor or walk the dog.
I'm sorry if you can't see where I'm coming from. I love the fact that it seems that because I write a blog, people can say whatever they want to me, but if I defend myself I'm being bitchy, hormonal, and unappreciative. It seems a little hypocritical if you ask me.
And if my rude remark was the comment I made EXPLAINING why I was talking about pregnancy in the blog, again, I apologized for coming off as rude, but stating MANY times that I was just explaining something. For the 100th time - it's the internet. People read things they way they want too. Some people read it in exactly they way I meant it - just saying "hey - can't stop writing about pregnancy, Toni's been pregnant and she'll be pregnant for awhile longer!" and other people read it as being defensive. I would think that if you appreciate me as much as I claim too, you would believe me and take me at my word. But you don't, and frankly I'm tired of arguing about something that's not going to change anyone's mind.
Frankly, I'm disgusted with anyone who chooses to be negative at this point, and I don't give a rats ass what you think of me or if you want to come back. I don't want you back. You can call me immature for that comment, and again I don't care. I'm making the best choice for me and my family, and the MAJORITY of people seem to get that, and trust and believe if I come back it will be for THEM, not for judgmental jerks who seem to think I owe them something.
PLEASE don't get me wrong, for the people who get it? Thank you SO much. I appreciate you. I hope to be back for you, and none of THAT was directed towards you. I understand that some of you are disappointed, and I apologize for that. But for anyone who thinks I owe you something? I don't. And I think anyone who's mature and rational would get that. It's a free blog that I did for fun. It's not fun anymore. Would you honestly keep doing something that you didn't like? Especially when it caused you stress and took away time from your family? I don't think so.
While I will not shut down the blog I am closing any further comments. I really appreciate the positive comments, but honestly, I am sick to death of the negative. I always told myself that the drama would not affect my blog like it did the others, and to ensure that I guess I just have to keep people from commenting. I'm sorry to have to "punish" the people who just want to nicely share their thoughts and opinions, encouragement... But really, I just don't want to hear the negative anymore, and I think the people who have been understanding will get that.
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