Seth's POV: What would I be Living without her here?

If you had asked me when the idea had come up, I would say that Ella was less than enthusiastic about going out of town with the group of us. I suspected that she didn’t really want to hang out with Drew, but I also knew how hesitant she was to go out of town with just me, so I didn’t know if Drew could be totally blamed, or if maybe she just didn’t like going out of town. I knew she hated to be from work, Nick had told me that even when work wasn’t busy, she hated to be away. I knew that was a turn off for a lot of guys, when a girl was in love with her work… But it made me love Ella just a little bit more. A lot of people might look at the kids she worked with and see a lost cause, or be afraid, but Ella looked at them and saw hope. Sure, she had told me stories of kids who didn’t make it, and I could tell it broke her heart whenever one of her kids messed up… But the way she talked when one of her kids did something right… Well, it was like she had won an Oscar or something.

However, after the whole Jarren debacle, I think getting out of town is something Ella not only needed, but wanted. She wasn’t afraid… I had made the mistake of asking her once if she was afraid Jarren would come back, and she had laughed.

“Jarren’s crazy, not dumb. She knows she’s in a mess of trouble right now. She won’t add any more to it. “ Was her annoyed, but amused response. She didn’t like people worrying about her, and she didn’t love the fact that us guys were making sure she was never alone.

I knew work had given her a hard time about the bruises. She knew people talked about it behind her back, wanting to know the real story, but Ella would never tell them. She just said it was an accident. I told her if she just told them she had been attacked, they might stop with the dirty looks and such, but Ella didn’t want to give them the satisfaction. She had made a few comments that made it seem like she had some issues with a few people who worked there. She wouldn’t quit, she was there for the kids, but… I could tell she really needed a break.

The break also seemed to come at a good time for Chloe. She had seemed drained these last couple of weeks, barely ever making it out of the house. When I mentioned maybe postponing the trip though, she got angry and told me to quit babying her. And sure enough, the days leading up to when we were supposed to leave, she slowly but surely got a new life to her. She ran around the house, packing, demanding to supervise our grocery shopping. It almost gave me hope that things were getting better with her… If she hadn’t pooped out halfway through the grocery trip and needed to get one of those ride on carts, or if it didn’t take her three days to pack her bags because she kept getting tired and needing a nap.

I was looking forward to this mini-vacation because I was hoping if Chloe had fun, it might bring back some of the fight in here. I got the feeling that she was just tired, and while I couldn’t blame her, I wasn’t ready for her to give up yet. I was hoping this trip might inject new life into us all, I had a feeling we all needed it.

We were planning on leaving early morning, so the night before we all went to Ella’s to spend the night. It was awkward at first with Drew and Christie and Ella and myself… Ella was avoiding Drew and being fake-nice to Christie. But, Matt went out to Blockbuster and picked up Raving Rabbids for the wii, and as soon as we were snowboarding on our butts, the tone seemed to lighten up. Ella even razzed Drew when she beat him at a mini-game.

I went to bed that night excited. I really felt like this trip was going to be a good thing for us all, that I wouldn’t worry so much, that Ella would relax, that Chloe would see how much fun life could be and want to beat her cancer… I almost couldn’t wait to get on the road the next morning.

Morning came quickly, and even though I was excited to get on the way, I was tired! I was relieved we had packed the mini-van that we had borrowed from my Mom the night before so we didn’t have to do it in the morning. Unfortunately, everyone else was able to climb into the van and go back to sleep, but since my dumb ass had offered to drive, I was stuck awake.

“Regretting it now, aren’t you?” Ella asked as she snuggled down into her blanket.

“No.” I lied. “You all need your beauty sleep. I don’t, it’s only fair.” I said, smiling at her.

She slapped me. “I was going to offer to buy you breakfast and coffee, but now forget about it.”

I mock pouted, and Ella shrugged, smiling. By the time I hit McDonalds, most everyone else was asleep, but Ella was ready, wallet in hand.

“Thought you were mad at me and weren’t going to buy me anything?” I said, smiling over at her.

“Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had McDonald’s breakfast?” She said. “You could murder my Mom and I’d still probably buy you breakfast.”

She leaned over to ask if anyone in the back wanted to order anything, and laughed.

“Hand me the camera.” She said.

“What, why?” I said, glancing around.

It was comical, they were all already passed out. Christi had claimed the front seat to herself, and Chloe was up against the window. The funniest part was Drew, who had passed out and must have fallen over onto Matt’s chest. In his sleep, Matt had wrapped an arm around him. They were cuddling.

Ella snapped a few pictures, grinning at me. We ordered, and on the road we went. I thought Ella would be my traveling companion, but soon after she finished her food, she cuddled down and fell asleep.

Of course, this meant when we finally arrived, everyone was wide awake, and I was exhausted. Ella and Chloe offered to show the guys some of the land. I sat on the deck, half dozing, half watching them walk away, when Christi plopped down next to me.

“He’s cute, huh?” She said, nodding her head in the direction of the group.

“Who? Drew?” I shrugged. “Sure. But he’s not really my type.” I said, winking at her.

“No. I mean, yeah Drew’s cute. I meant Matt though.”

“Matt? Aren’t you dating Drew?” I asked, confused.

“Yeah. But that doesn’t mean I’m blind…”

“Are you and Drew OK?”

She shrugged. “I guess so. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I like him. We have fun together. But, I dunno. I just don’t know if he’s it, you know? So now I’m wondering if I hold on, because there’s nothing really wrong with the relationship, and wait awhile longer to see if feelings pop up, or if I…” She trailed off. “I dunno. Maybe it’s dumb, I mean we haven’t been together that long, so could I really know if he was the one?”

Now it was my turn to shrug. “I don’t think you have to KNOW, but I do think you have to at least feel like it could head in that direction. If you know that it’s not… Well, there’s really no point in hanging on.” I answered.

“But I mean, why break up with someone when there’s nothing really wrong?” She asked.

“Because you’re not feeling it? I mean you can give a little more time and see if feelings pop up… But I just think that if they aren’t even a little there, they won’t be. I mean you could hang on and have your fun, but who’s to say the other person doesn’t have feelings? Feelings only get stronger, Chris.”

“I know…” She trailed off, and I know she was thinking.

“So. You and Matt, eh?” I said, squinting in his direction. “You don’t think that’ll be a little awkward?”

She laughed. “I said he was cute, Sethers. I didn’t say that I wanted to date him. I think someone else does.” She said, keeping her eye on the group.

“Ella?” I asked. “You think Ella wants to hook up with Matt?”

“No, stupid. I think Ella’s happy with who’s she with now. I mean…” She looked over there again.

“Chloe?” I asked, surprised. Chloe didn’t date anymore.

“Mmm. And from the looks of things, I’d say the feeling is mutual.” Christi said, again nodding her head towards them.

I watched as Matt said something to Chloe, and Chloe laughed and shoved him a little. A moment later, Matt bent down and lifted Chloe onto his back.

No brother likes the idea of his baby sister dating a guy, so my first reaction was a protective one. But, then I realized… Well, maybe this is what Chloe needed. Maybe a new relationship would make her want to fight a little harder, hold on a little longer. I was all for that.

“So. You and Ella.” Christi said.

“What about us?” I asked, breaking my stare and turning my eyes back to Christi.

“You think she’s the one? Or is this for fun.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I think she has a strong possibility of being the one.”

I expected Christi to respond in some kind – either laugh and whoop and ask me when I was going to pop the question (she was always ahead of herself) or protest and ask how I could know after such a short amount of time. Instead, she did nothing but nod. Then she left the deck, to go join the others.