Seth's POV

I know it sounds cliché. But I have never met anyone like Ella McLean. Sure, she was pretty, but I had known a lot of pretty girls. Looks alone are only good for some things, and believe me when I say that guys do eventually get tired of that. I knew I liked Ella before I went away with her, but now it was pretty safe to say that I was in love.

However, I wasn’t sure how she felt about me. When we were alone, I knew it. The way she looked at me, the way she smiled at me, the way she touched me… It all meant one thing. But I watched her when we were around Drew… Well, you were able to physically feel the coldness come off her. He affected her, and right now it was in a negative way, but I knew how easily that could flip. I trusted Ella. I don’t think she would cheat on me or lie to me, but I didn’t know if she would pick me over Drew.

She was quiet on the way home, and I knew she was upset about going away again.

“If you don’t want to spend time with me, you don’t have too.” I meant it as a joke, but I knew the second the words were out of my mouth, it didn’t sound like one.

“What makes you think I don’t want to spend time with you?” She asked, looking confused and slightly annoyed.

“I was joking… You just seem upset about going to Grandpop’s house again. I thought we had a good time…”

“We did… I want to go back…” She trailed off, looking out the window.

“You just don’t want to go with Drew.” I said, reaching for her hand.

“That obvious?” She asked, glancing over at me with a wry smile.

“Yeah. Actually. You change when you’re around him. You get really… Stone cold, I guess is the best way to put it.”

“I’m sorry.” She answered, glancing away again.

“What happened? I thought you told me you two were best friends.
”
“I also told you we dated. It is never good for friends to date.”

“You really believe that?” I asked, turning into her driveway.

“I don’t know. I mean I wouldn’t say it ends badly for everyone, there’s always an exception to every rule, but for the most part… I mean Jason and I dated, and we’re just now sort of getting back to being OK. And even that… Well it’s not anywhere close to where it used to be, and I don’t think we’ll ever get back to that place. Drew and I are in total ruins. I don’t know what I did to make him so angry at me, but I know I’m done with it all.”

“He’s in love with you.” I stated simply. I knew we were about to get into a conversation that neither of us probably wanted to have, but I knew I couldn’t go any further into this relationship unless we had it.

She snorted. “No, he’s not. He hates me right now.”

“He wants to hate you, because he’s in love with you, and it hurts. So he’s trying to mask that with being angry with you. Trust me Ella, the guy is tortured.”

She shook her head. “I don’t buy it. He told me to move on, he told me to date other people. Someone in love would NEVER say that. Besides, he’s with Christi.”

“Christi, a girl who is a lot like you. I said it myself.”

“So, are you saying you’re with me to replace Christi?”

“No. I knew it wouldn’t work out with Christi. You have everything I admired in Christi, plus more.”

“Well. Maybe it’s the same with Drew.”

Now it was my turn to shake my head. “You don’t have to believe it, but I’m telling you. Head over heels.” I paused, trying to summon courage to pose the next question. “If he wasn’t with Christi, would you want to get back with him?”

She was quiet for a long while. I know this might make other guys nervous, but honestly, I knew that the longer she thought about it, the more believable her answer would be. If she came back with a quick yes, I would suspect she was only trying to say what she thought I wanted to hear.

“No. I don’t think I would. I have feelings for Drew, that’s undeniable. But… I guess I just learned with Jason is to let go. It didn’t work. There’s no point in dwelling on the past. And no matter what you say, if Drew wanted to be with me so badly, he’d tell me. He doesn’t want me.”

“I heard nothing in there about your feelings for me…” I said, suddenly feeling angry. “If all this is about is Drew not telling you he wants you, then why are you with me?”

“You didn’t ask me how I felt about you. You asked me about Drew. And you also asked me to be honest with you, and that’s the truth. I believe that if Drew wanted to be with me, he’d tell me. But again, even if he were to come to me and tell me differently? We’re done. If I keep looking back, I have a feeling I’ll never move forward.”

I was still frustrated. I had hoped that by asking her about Drew, this conversation would turn into one about us, our relationship, and where we were going.

“I just don’t get it. If you still want him, you should be with him and not me. Or at least by yourself. I don’t know want to be with you if you still want to be with someone else.”

She sighed loudly, obviously annoyed with me as well. “I don’t want to be with Drew, Seth. It’s just one of those things… He’s been my friend for so long, and I cared about him a lot. Feelings like that don’t go away overnight, and sometimes they NEVER go away. I promised you that I would be honest with you, and this is just me being honest. If you don’t like or are uncomfortable with the answer, then maybe we just aren’t going to work.” Her arms were across her chest now, and I could tell she was angry and upset.

“I’m sorry Ella. I just don’t understand I guess.”

“Then maybe you should just go home tonight.” She said, getting out and slamming the door.

I sat in her driveway for a moment, waiting to see if she’d come back out, and trying to decide if I should go back in. Eventually I decided just to give her space, and I backed out of the driveway and headed home.

I just didn’t understand her. And I didn’t want to be in a relationship where I was only there as second choice.

When I arrived home, the house was dark with a flicker on the TV. I walked in to Chloe, camped out on the couch, her head wrapped lying under her pink snuggie.

“Why are you home?” She asked, looking confused. “I thought you were staying at Ella’s?”

“We got into a fight.” I said, sitting down on the couch. She started to scoot up to give me room, but I pulled her feet across my lap. I knew she was most comfortable laying down. “Where is everyone else?”

“They went out to dinner. I didn’t feel like eating. You guys got into a fight already? You just got back from what looked to be the most awesome weekend ever, making goo goo eyes at each other, and in what? Ten minutes you fight?”

I shrugged, focusing on the TV. I could feel Chloe’s eyes on me.

“What’d you fight about?”

“Drew. I asked her if she still had feelings for him and she said yes.”

“Ohmygod. No way! She totally is in love with you.” Chloe exclaimed. “What exactly did she say?”

I didn’t want to get into it. While the weekend had been amazing, it had also been exhausting. But I knew Chloe wouldn’t back down, and it would take more energy to fight her then to just give in. SO I repeated the conversation as close to word for word as I could.

“Seth.” Chloe said, leaning up and smacking my forehead. “She never said she wanted to be with Drew. She said she had feelings for him. Which, is understandably and had she said anything differently I wouldn’t be so quick to believe her. You need to go back over there an apologize!”

“But she didn’t say anything about how she felt about me!” I shot back, rubbing my forehead.

“And you didn’t ASK about you, you asked about Drew. You always do this Seth, you always really like a girl and then find some way to back out of the whole thing. I get that Ella’s situation is a little complicated, but would you look at ours? She’s been really great, and you know it.”

I didn’t answer, just looked away. “I guess I’m just unsure of where we stand. Where I stand. I don’t want to like her so much only to find out she doesn’t like me at all.”

“Yeah, well, welcome to being in a relationship, bucko. It’s all about taking a chance. The only way to find out where you stand is to go back over there and ask her. So go. And take some flowers with you or something.”

Sometimes I hated to admit that my little sister was smarter than me. But, she usually was. So I pulled myself off the couch and headed back over to Ella’s.